Solo artist

I'm auditioning for a new role today - that of full-time, stay-at-home mom. That is stay-at-home-alone. ALONE. It's Steve's first day back at work.

So far, so good. No major meltdown this morning as had been the pattern of the last few days. After just 5 interrupted hours of sleep last night, I managed to lay down for an hour this morning while Gracie slept. I didn't sleep, but at least I rested. We went to the grocery store, and we are both clean, dressed and well-fed. And I have even checked a few things off my to do list and finished a chapter of Wild Swans (highly recommend it so far; maybe I'll even finish it before August). Hoping to start returning phone calls this afternoon, and if things go really well, maybe even make a batch of cookie dough (I can eat raw eggs again!!! Yes, I know that can doesn't equal should). Thanks, Aunt Mary, for the excellent advice to get a shower before Steve leaves for work. I think that will be key to making sure we get out of the house each day. Unfortunately, it's raining (and supposed to rain the rest of the week - what kind of cruel trick on new mother counting on walks for sanity is this?).

Tomorrow, I will master the Moby wrap. Thank you, Stacey! I can't wait to try it.

Birthday wishes

Two fab friends, same birthday... Pete in Durham and Emm in San Francisco.





Wish we could celebrate with you!

What's in a name

As you know, we kept Grace's name a secret until she was born, despite many inquiries, promises not to tell or make a face, and bribes. If the bribes had been better, we might have told. Actually, we hadn't entirely settled on Grace Marie until she was born, and wanted to wait and meet her before committing.

Originally, we planned on using Grace as the middle name for the front-runner first name. However, as we thought about it we found ourselves liking Grace more and more as a first name, both for it's simplicity and meaning. Also, my enthusiasm for the original first name started to wane. The problem was that we couldn't settle on a middle name to go with Grace. I don't remember how we started experimenting with Marie, but it's a name we both found beautiful, though not quite right as a first name in this case. They seemed to go together, especially when we started calling her the nickname Gracie Mae (Mae is a diminutive of Marie).

When she was born they kept asking us what her name was. I didn't get to see her for what seemed like an eternity (I had her on my belly right away, but I didn't get a good look at her face for a while) and I had to keep saying I have to see her face to be sure. When I finally did see her, she was indeed Grace. And it's a good thing, too; she might still be nameless otherwise since Steve and I pretty much couldn't agree on any other options... I wonder how many people get their names that way.

Added photos to May.

Two weeks old

It took forever and a day to get this shot. There are about a dozen in which Grace is looking away or moving or if she's not, Steve or I are doing something stupid like closing our eyes. I look way more tired than I actually am - Gracie just looks so cute in this picture that I'm posting it despite the fact that I look like I just opened my eyes.


Grace has been fuss-tastic the last few days, but today was a bit better so we're crossing our fingers that TJ's spicy black bean dip (so good!) is responsible, not that we have a grumpy baby. If she makes me cut out spicy foods, we may be in trouble, but for a few hours of peace I suppose I can do it for a year. That's just a little longer than pregnancy...

We are learning to embrace a slower pace - lots of long walks, reading, laundry, and rocking Grace. Sounds pretty good, actually.

Updates

It has been quite a week! We're feeling a little more on top of things than a week ago - getting to know Gracie's needs and cries and having a lot of fun. Grace is so sweet and loves to be cuddled and held. She also has a hilariously expressive face. I wish the photos could capture it.

We went to my graduation on Sunday and my dad and two aunts visited on Monday. Grace and I went to a mom and baby group on Tuesday (seems like it'll be a great way to meet other people in our part of the city and learn from others' experiences). Grace had another pediatrician appointment on Wednesday and she's already 8.5 pounds. She's gaining at three times the rate they set as the minimum. We find this a little alarming, but the doctor assures us it's not a concern. We've also been getting out for lots of walks, and found that heading over to the river to walk in the evening is a good way to mitigate the 2-3 hour fuss-a-thon that has become one of the only predictable parts of our new life.

I'm giving flickr a try for pictures - I'll keep updating this set and see how it goes. We have not been as good about taking pictures as we should be but we're trying because I know we'll look back and wish we had more.

I couldn't have said it better

I really enjoy Timothy Egan's pieces, especially for their Washington-based angle (and by that I mean the real Washington). He nailed it regarding the latest California fiasco. I often feel a traitor for my deep and abiding love for my second state, but Egan sums up why I love it so well (though we were raised to hate them for driving up real estate prices in Washington), "The other states may hate California, and as a native Pacific Northwesterner I was raised to despise the “sunbaked barbarians,”... It’s a wonderful state, from the High Sierra to Death Valley, from the redwoods of the rain forest to the Joshua trees of the desert. And it’s stuffed with creative optimists."

Plus, Steve is from California, as is my mother, and many of my dearest friends and family. And the Lakers.

Just call me master

I graduated on Sunday and we actually made it to the ceremony! Saturday night I went to bed saying there was no way we'd have it together enough to go, but a few hours of uninterrupted sleep made me wake up ready to try. Grace did fabulously! She loved the car (and thank God we recently discovered that her car seat is quite possibly her favorite place; she likes it way more than her bassinet for chillin' - must be because her dad's from Cali) and was one of the most well behaved babies there. I suppose that since newborns don't do much we shouldn't be too self-satisfied. She was absolutely a star with everyone so excited to see her!

It was wonderful to be able to briefly celebrate with my friends. I am very glad to be done with school in some ways (free evenings and weekends! and by free I mean now completely consumed by Gracie), but I had an excellent experience in the program. I got to spend the last two years thinking, reading and writing about about social policy and my particular interest, health care, while surrounded by smart people who care deeply about social justice. I am grateful for the opportunity.

Quack

To celebrate Grace's first week of life, we took a walk to the Public Garden to enjoy the spectacularly beautiful spring day. Steve has been trying to convince me to pose for a picture with the famous ducklings for some time, but I've been putting him off by saying that I would do it once we had a child to be in the picture. Obviously, I'm out of excuses so here we are!

Gracie had several admirers as we posed - she seems to draw them wherever she goes. She mostly likes cruising in her stroller and gazing at her hands as she waves them around.

Tummy Time

Because newborns sleep on their backs, it is very difficult for them to develop the neck muscles necessary to lift their head leading to the solution - the vile ritual of tummy time. Gracie Mae had her first tummy time on her third day of life and was able to lift and turn her head - way to go girl!

Home

Gracie Mae came home on Sunday after screaming so much through her hearing test that she disrupted the readings so much that Steve had to hold her to get it done (it still took forever). Fortunately, despite her best attempts to deafen everyone, she can hear in both ears!

She seemed to enjoy the stroll home. Since coming home she seems to be mellowing out... though our neighbors might disagree.

She likes to sleep with her arms thrown over her head. It's among her many absurdly cute traits. We could stare at this girl all day.

Proof:

Oh, and I didn't actually say so below, but she was born on May 8, 2009.

Grace Marie

Here she is!

We are completely taken with her.

Overjoyed and exhausted.


Labor started Wednesday night and after my regular doctor's appointment on Thursday I was finally admitted in the early evening. Another sleepless night, but everything went well and Steve was awesome. I'm so glad he had done this before - as in helped with deliveries during med school - because he knew how to talk me through pushing really well. When she was finally delivered, they put her on my belly and it was truly amazing. We have been having a wonderful, sleepless time getting to know her. I've perhaps had 5 hours of sleep in three days.

A watched pot

It's May 2, so I lose the pool from my baby shower in which we guessed the birth date. Still having intermittent contractions and every once in a while they're close enough together that I think we might be in business... then they stop.

I'm done cleaning. Partly because there's nothing left to do, but start over and partly because I'm not interested anymore. And I want to read the last 200 pages of my book today because I know I'll never finish it if I don't before baby girl joins us. Too bad I have the attention span of a gnat.

All in all (granted it's not quite over), this has been such an easy pregnancy. I still have energy, my feet and back just betray me when I get overzealous. Except for heartburn, which is possibly the source of all evil, I can't complain much. A few weeks ago I had a whole mental list of positive and negative reflections to share, but they have all vanished from my mind (along with much else).

Ashley, my dear college and after roommate who is now a pediatrician, calmed all my fears about the pandemic. It's all about handwashing and hand disinfectant and not worrying about offending people by being uptight about making them de-germ before touching my child. I'm warning you all now that I'm about to lose my mind for a few months, so please bear with me.

My mom is arriving this afternoon. Yay! Can't wait to have her here. Plus, our standard of eating will skyrocket. Guess we'll find out if a watched pot boils!

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just tried to post this... on the food blog. how awesome would that have been. more proof i'm losing it.